Well picture this it’s your typical night out with your friends You’ve had your pre's and your pub crawl, now you need somewhere to end The obvious choice is a nightclub a short walk down the way And in my current state I’ll just blissfully say “Sure thing, sounds like a good idea” Problem is Dancing usually scares me out of my skin But I've had enough to drink so far it seems my minds given in At least for the idea and at least it seems just for now Maybe tonight I’ll pull off something somehow We’ll see, I think optimistically And as I walk in it becomes clear Tonight I'm not gonna face up to my fears The music starts playing and I head for a wall My feet turn cast iron so its a shuffle to a crawl I've come crashing to the realisation that its gonna Be a long night I know it sounds foolish but that's just how I am And my brains screaming “traitor! This wasn’t part of the plan Just a few quiet drinks out, with your friends, on your night off, no stunts Need I tell you again You see its no conscious decision for my mind to lock down My limbs become limp and autopilot sparks out I feel a thousand judging eyes watching my every move But in reality its false, just a mindset, a mood I don't know where it comes from but its always there, without fail I get there’s no pressure and I get there's no qualm With letting loose once in a while, long as you’re doing no harm And I'm aware right now I'm as fun as a fart in a full ferry But my minds now gone numb like static on the telly I'm on the edge of the room looking in, I’ve officially bailed The music starts playing and I head for a wall My feet turn cast iron so its a shuffle to a crawl I've come crashing to the realisation that its gonna Be a long night I know it sounds foolish but that's just how I am And my brains screaming “traitor! This wasn’t part of the plan Now you’re sober again, and you’re lonely and scared and its all your own stupid fault” Why did I come here why did I try I just want to know if it's worth it, that I can feel alive The music starts playing and I head for a wall My feet turn cast iron so its a shuffle to a crawl I've come crashing to the realisation that its gonna Be a long long night Yeah it's gonna be a long night The music's still playing and I'm still here on the wall To and fro the bar as if anything would help this at all Watching like some weirdo, as everyone has fun tonight I bear no resentment for anyone else This something I’ve gotta sort out for myself Or just deal with it, don’t attach to an idea, that I’m not comfortable with

I don’t know why I tried so hard to be like the other guys With their swaggers and their bikes But I did I don't know why I try so hard to see things from the other side When I'm fighting against fire Yet I do But here’s to hoping I don't know why I tried to be a somebody in school The idea seemed so cool Unlike me I don't know why I wanted so bad to just fit in Be another piece in this sin Of a place But here’s to hoping I wanted to fly so very high But took a one way ticket down I'm still not sure as to why My imagination wandered the clouds The ones I knew then I was never sure if I was to call them my friends It all seemed so pretentious To me As soon as the going got tough They were the first to say they'd had enough That I had pushed my luck One last time I didn't know what had happened I wanted to fly so very high But took a one way ticket down I'm still not sure as to why My imagination wandered the clouds I went for years Thinking that all of this was all my fault That I am just an assault On the brain But when I left school I met others who helped break the fall And made me feel some worth after all Then I realised The world is so damn full of drama Most people don't see past themselves They're happy causing countless trauma Just so they have got a story to tell I don't know why I tried so hard to be like the other guys With their football and their fights

I Just need more time I think I'm doing what is really right But good things never happen overnight Why I just wanna know why The biggest thing in this world is spite And people who are longing for a fight And most don’t seem to see the problem With seeing others as just rungs Self elation or self indulgence Is Causing pain our nature: 101? Don't you dare Pretend that you care Or that you know what its like To be a s-s-social suicide Its all Id ever known To be mistrusted and alone The words of other predate any first impression And all i can do is hide

Everyone has predicaments Causing them regular laments Id like to share mine right now with you Don't worry, you wont have to share yours too You see my problem lies with hand to eye My coordination has sure seen better times I'm gonna start my honesty circle right about here As far away from the bar as I can get, cus I’ll probably spill a beer I've tried so hard to make me right But I can’t seem to see the signs Of when my spatial awareness dies And I've already knocked my pint I belong in clumsy town Where it's sippy tops on glasses now Its been happening for years somehow And I'm not sure why but I'm still allowed out I sometimes wish I had a place to hide For when the venomous viper in my side Decides that today its gonna strike And make me a walking ad for Carpetright My fingers cant seem to take the strain Of the mixed up muddled up messages they receive from my brain I know its crossed wires up there but they should be used to that by now Instead of making me slip and need somebody to fetch a bar towel I've tried so hard to make me right But I can’t seem to see the signs Of when my spatial awareness dies And I've already missed my pint I belong in clumsy town Where it's sippy tops on glasses now Its been happening for years somehow And I'm not sure why but I'm still allowed out Who would’ve thought A quarter of a pint of beer Could soak the entire floor And wash everybody out of here I thought I had gotten past all this That it was somehow a bullet that had finally missed I played a gig at the Monument, where I felt near my best I stepped forward to take a shot and spilled a glass of water Right across the desk I'm right home in clumsy town Where Its sippy tops on glasses now Its been happening for years somehow And I'm not sure why but I'm still allowed out I've tried so hard to make me right But I can’t seem to see the signs Of when my spatial awareness dies And sh*t, I've already dropped my pint

Every setlist every song, even if it's not that long Makes me feel the same way makes me nervous and afraid Because I hate the way I sing, and play guitar, just everything I don't know what I do wrong, but I've been doing it so long It's not like I've got a choice, I'm stuck with hating my own voice I'll just have to put up with it, it's all I've got and I won't quit I'll have to find a way to get by or just get better, I've gotta try Seems that I lack the confidence to relax, and get some sense Cus I've been told I'm shit And I've been informed that I could never make it And the truth remains the same they say That no-one will ever know your name With every single song I write, it never feels like a good night To try it out, give it a go, I know I'll just end up feeling low There must be atleast ten or more of my songs I've never played before I always try but I freak out thinking I'll do it tomorrow, without a doubt And I've been told I'm shit And I've been informed that I could never make it And the truth remains the same they say That no-one will ever know your name Will I ever be at peace with myself? Will I ever think that I don't need help? Will I ever play anything I like? Now you're probably wondering, if he hates it why does he sing Well my friends I did not explain, I love that feeling when I play I don't paly cus I think I'm good I just play cus I think I should I love the rush the ecstasy, it helps me forget about me And when I stop, I don't know what to do Do I quickly run away or quietly say thank you But I'll stand and wait awkwardly for someone to take over from me Cus this night must go on, mine will never be the last song And I've been told I'm shit And I've been informed that I could never make it And the truth remains the same they say That no-one will ever know your name I've been told I'm shit But I've been assured that I should take no notice And the truth remains unclear to me I don't know who I wanna be

Woah here we go again once more I feel like crap My high horse has tripped over itself and my saunters fallen flat I've not yet worked out if its from driving home or simply because it’s late But I've got four more gigs this weekend, so feeling like craps gonna have to wait But I think, there's something different this time I haven’t got the lump in my stomach, or the rain cloud in my mind Dare I say, I don’t even feel the normal foreboding signs So this time I’ll take a chance and say I’ll be alright I've got to work this out, why this times not hit the same way There's got to be a reason, something special about today I mean I feel like I’ve accomplished something good but there must be an explanation Something I've said or done to prevent the usual procrastination When this hits, on a normal day I'm a write off My Inspiration takes a holiday and my voice is a dying cough Another waste, of the rare sunshine outside Suppose I’ll just make use of it next time I'm sick of feeling like a jigsaw puzzle Sometimes together, but most of the time just in bits in my box I am forever muddled, between shutting my open doors and simultaneously trying to force the locks I know I’ve got a dream But I haven’t got a clue what the future holds in store for me Though it scares me, I’ll use what I have seen And take each day with a fistful of hope and my best positivity Cus I'm not a slave to these times I'm not gonna take a backseat while my brain fucks up my life I won’t waste too much more of my limited time No more saying no I’ll just shut up and go I'm not gonna keep waiting till tomorrow